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The Love and the Volume

by Arison Cain

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1.
So Here Goes 01:40
This is one more attempt to be on the verge of reconstructing my masterpiece. This is one more beautiful line before I decide to write myself into the corner I've been crawling toward and if I've really been as blessed as every stranger ever said, then maybe now it's time I showed them why I am, so here goes. After all of this catastrophe, the love that I've been searching for still hasn't seen the last of me and after all of this hyperbole, the friends that I've been sacrificing haven't seen the worst of me and if it all goes as planned, they'll be rushing from the stands just to catch a glimpse of my heart shattering again, so here goes. So I thank you for being patient while I figured out just how to break this to you. I've resigned to do what I'm designed to do and I'll inspire 'til I die like I'm inclined to do, so here goes.
2.
I'm terrified to let my hopes get all the way up there again, but there they go. How was I supposed to know I wasn't making sense? (I'm just beside myself right now) So here comes the love, and here comes the volume. Crank up the sub, it's a bitch to hold on to! I've had enough of never living like I wanted to be, so here comes the love. I'm petrified of all these no-good ne'er-do-well's who emphasize holding gross. I'm on the verge of letting go of all my common sense, If I did, I'd be liable to explode. Here comes the love, and here comes the volume. Crank up the sub, it's a bitch to hold on to! I've had enough of never living like I wanted to be. So here comes the love. No, you can't keep a good man down, and even if you could, then I would have been down for the count a long-ass time ago. So here comes the love, and here comes the volume. It's a bitch to hold on to! I've had enough of never living like I wanted to be. I'm terrified to let my hopes get all the way up there again, but there they go. Here comes the love and here comes the volume.
3.
I'm caught between a hard place and a giant mess of a stone, but I won't settle for anything less, the more you put me through this stress, the more I want you for my own. I suppose we all need something to pine for. Is this what I've been losing my mind for? Girl, you've got me up and spinning out of control, and I've been trying hard just to fight it, but I already know. You have me lost in the rhythm of the right song, baby leave the lights on and dim 'em down low. I'm begging, Wanda, please, I'm on my knees, I'm ready to go. And when you say "I need you too", just between me and you, what's a boy like me to do without you here to hold? I suppose we all need something to pine for. Is this what I've been losing my mind for? Girl, you've got me up and spinning out of control, and I've been trying hard just to fight it, but I already know. You have me lost in the rhythm of the right song, baby leave the lights on and dim 'em down low. I'm not myself around you, but I can't be anyone else around you. I'm not myself around you. I'm not myself. I'm begging Wanda, please. I'm on my knees, I'm ready to go. Girl, you've got me up and spinning out of control, and I've been trying hard just to fight it, but I already know. You have me lost in the rhythm of the right song, baby leave the lights on and dim 'em down low.
4.
I will never find love in Los Angeles, because I'm pretty sure there's no such thing and even if there is, I think I probably couldn't handle it, so I'll abandon it, Los Angeles, and sing. I can't even believe I'm rubbing elbows down on Melrose with some people that I never thought I'd meet. But where in the city of angels is anyone who's able to inspire someone like me? Los Angeles, I see them everywhere I turn, another babe in a Mercedes, who's just waiting for a bridge like mine to burn. Why in the world is this place so unbearably fake and when will I ever learn? I will never find love in Los Angeles, because I'm pretty sure there's no such thing and even if there is, I think I probably couldn't handle it, so I'll abandon it, Los Angeles, and sing. And even though it puts a strain on my voice every day, there's really nothing I can do. I will never find love in Los Angeles, because I'm pretty sure there's no such thing and even if there is, I think I probably couldn't handle it, so I'll abandon it, Los Angeles, and sing about the California girls, although I must inform ya, I can barely stand to see my heart out in the sand. It's the intoxicating notion that this God-forsaken ocean's gonna swallow a man like me. Los Angeles, We'll See.
5.
Darling 03:42
This last sad song might be all that's left in my head, one more agonizing mantle piece for you to take home again. But so what if you don't wanna be bound by a ring to me? I've still got all kinds of friends who will sing with me! So fuck you, darling. You don't deserve an ounce of love. The things that you have done to me are nothing to be proud of. If you don't get it, I'm not singing loud enough. So fuck you, darling. You don't deserve an ounce of love. You seem to think that all that this depended on was my fragile kind of confidence, and the lies that you had spent it on. Well, I've got news that probably won't sit that right with you. I could have done this all without you fucking all those other dudes. So fucking fuck you, darling. You don't deserve an ounce of love. The shit that you have done to me is nothing to be proud of. If you don't get it, I'm not singing loud enough. So fuck you, darling. You don't deserve an ounce of love. Fuck you, darling. You don't deserve these words at all. The last thing that you did to me was easily the worst of all. If you don't get it now, here's why I never call. Cause fuck you, darling. Yeah, fuck you, darling. Fuck you, Darling, you don't deserve my love at all.
6.
I really just don't understand what my problem is. I keep shorting my circuits and frying my conduits. How could I manage to be so innoucuous? To be honest, my lungs just can't handle their oxygen. I can't seem to find the answers when you ask me why I keep traveling on, but all I need is an atlas and some attitude, and I'll keep traveling on. I really just don't understand what my problem is. All of this nonsense just feels so preposterous. I'll exaggerate matters and claim I'm on top of it. As a matter of fact, It's exactly the opposite. I can't seem to find the answers when you ask me why I keep traveling on, but all I need is an atlas and some attitude, and I'll keep traveling on. I really just don't understand what my problem is. I keep shorting my circuits and frying my conduits. I can't seem to find the answers when you ask me why I keep traveling on, but all I need is an atlas and some attitude, and I'll keep traveling on. I'll keep traveling on.
7.
I'm half a bottle deep and I'm asking myself for the answers to all the questions that are ringing in my head. Am I lost? Am I dead? I'm not ready to know. Will my brains ever work the same again, or have I forsaken them? I'm out to sea, I have to see just where the current has taken them. I'm capable of anything and nobody knows it but me. I've gotta do more than just land on my feet, get fucked up, go to bed, and repeat. There's another bottle interrupting the novel that I've been meaning to pen and it's impossible to make any headway when I'm wasting my head away. Leave it up to me, it's gonna be another chemical getaway. I'm capable of anything and nobody knows it but me. I've gotta do more than just land on my feet, get fucked up, go to bed, and repeat. I need to motivate myself before I decimate myself. I need to reason with myself. I'm on the verge of disaster, as far as I can tell. I've gotta do more than just land on my feet, get fucked up, go to bed, and repeat.
8.
I know the nights seem awfully long on the island that you're on. Trust me, they're no shorter on the California border, but if I get my words in order, you might sort of sing along. And if I thought that this would win you over, I'd play it all over the world and when I reach the loudest parts, I'll lose my sense of balance and start to salvage every gallon left of valor in this trusty heart. Cause I need someone to help me stand. It may seem like a ridiculous demand. We're victims of circumstance and after all, your footing's just as insecure as mine, just as insecure as mine. If I thought that this would win you over, I'd play it all over the world and when I reach the loudest parts, I'll lose my sense of balance and start to salvage every gallon left of valor in this trusty heart. Cause I need someone to help me stand. It may seem like a ridiculous demand. We're victims of circumstance and after all, your footing's just as insecure as mine. I believe that love can change the world because when I fall in love, the entire world just changes. We're just victims of circumstance and after all, your footing's just as insecure as mine, just as insecure as mine.
9.
You can call me optimistically sober, but that's the only way I know to win you over. If the nights that I had given you were longer, I would have been happy to admit that I was wrong, girl. It's a shame I let you think I didn't want to. It was my pride that I was sick of holding on to, oh girl, but now I'm broken-hearted. From one lover to another, I'll give your heart another moment to recover. If recovery is going to exhaust you, I would hate to let you feel like I had lost you, oh girl, but now I'm broken.
10.
Oh, If life is but a dream, let me take control of mine. I just need a little help to get to sleep. Dare I defy my restless mind? It won't get the best of me. At any moment, out of nowhere, everything we've ever loved can be completely swept right out from under us. So sing it loud, I need someone to hear me now! I'm speaking up, I'm looking down with every step I take. I'm careful where I walk these days. It's not the same since you've been gone. I guess it never will be, and it kills me, but I'm wide awake and well on my way home. Any moment, out of nowhere, everything we've ever loved can be completely swept right out from under us. Completely swept right out from under us.

about

By all accounts, this album probably shouldn't exist.

Several times over the past four years, it felt like the entire universe was working against the very idea of it. To be honest, part of me probably won't believe it will ever be finished until I am reading these words in the liner notes. For a little while, I had almost given up hope.

You see, the funny thing about hope is that, even under the most trying of circumstances, it is ours, and ours alone. No one can take it away from us. The only way it can be lost is if we have chosen to lose it and, even then, it can only really be misplaced. We can always find hope if we are willing to look for it.

If I have learned anything creating The Love and the Volume, it is that change is inevitable. At any moment, out of nowhere, everything we've ever loved can be completely swept right out from under us. I submit to you that there is no concept in the world more beautiful and exciting than that one, so long as you still have hope.

credits

released October 14, 2014

Words and Music by Arison Cain. Produced by David Bowick at Studio Rev in Los Angeles. Mixed and Mastered by Matthew Corey at Sidetracked Studios. Featuring performances by Arison Cain, David Bowick, Geoff Godfrey, Nate Hertweck and Matthew Corey. Additional Vocals on "So Here Goes" and "Nothing Lost Forever" provided by Kymberly Stewart and Stacy Entel. Artwork by Sam Bennett.

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Arison Cain Long Beach, California

Hi, I'm Arison Cain.

I live by the philosophy that one great song can change the world, or at least the world that each of us is living in right now.

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